Not that I’m religious or anything but saying “Happy Easter” to people does put a nice bounce to my step. The best Easter surprise so far (aside from dozen flutes of mimosas) came from my email inbox. Ania from Warsaw, a fellow talented artsy gamer girl, sent me a photo of this:

I am floored.

Painstakingly beautiful stain-glass versions of WoW character with a complete Warcraft map draped behind it.  I don’t think I even have that much patience to do something exquisite like that.  Ania on the process:

Well, fist i drew on the egg with a graphic pen, the kind that can write on any surface. I drew the continents
and simple character outlines. Than I busted out my acrylic paint and painted the surface.
And last i retouched the contours with the pen again.

So i think the whole thing took about an hour a half maybe more, I was really into it so I’m not sure
I realised a more “realistic” or illustrative style wouldn’t work, or really fit on to the egg.

Also, I love that the Outlands whirl Maelstrom looks like a giant meteorological typhoon.  Reminds me of home a lot.

Thanks so much Ania! You’ve brightened up my Easter Sunday!

Cisco officially turned 3 today.  Inspired by all the 2009 Westminster dog show clips I watched today, I figured PJ and I should really treat him as if he just won the coveted Best in Show award!  I decided to bake him a nice little birthday cupcake that’s dog-friendly and extraordinary:

The “cake” base is actually cornbread batter.  I lined the inside of a cupcake mold with a strip of bacon in order to make the bacon “cup.”  As for the faux frosting, I blended the living crap out of some cottage cheese with a bit of vegetable in order to get a frosting consistancy.  Sprinkled some kibble and voila!– an hour of work for a mere 5 seconds of complete obliteration.

Of course I made Otis one too.  I mean, c’mon, it wouldn’t be fair.

I’m a giant Bubble Bobble nut, and although I never finished the whole game on the Famicom, I did spent a lot of years back in 8th grade perfecting my Bubble Bobble skills when I discovered NES emulators.  I used to take notes on certain levels; crafting nice cocktail matrix of timing specifics, special bonus items, warp umbrellas, and foe moving patterns.  Also, it helped that I didn’t really have a life in 8th grade.

So Japan gaming magazine/bible Famitsu has a screenshot-heavy article about the upcoming Bubble Bobble Wii.  My burning questions are: is it going to still have the same 8-bit charm as the original?  Will the new gameplay be worth it?  Will this game be so awesome that I will resort back to the obsessive hermit ways of my 8th grade self?  Or will this revitalized version shatter my treasured childhood memories (I’m looking at you, Galaga: Legions)?

Observation #1:

First off, I’m sorry, the new Bubble Bobble dinosaurs are fug.  I dare say they’re even panda-dogs.  My main complaint is that the top-most dinosaur spike/saggital crest is way too prominent so it looks like a giant spike.  Head spikes are for lowly henchman foes in 8-bit video games.  They’re like the Red Shirts of the monster squad.  Bubble Bobble dinos are heroes, goddammit, and they deserve to be cute and likeable.

Observation #2:

HOLY CRAP, SLOPES!  This is probably the biggest new change in the game, in my opinion.  It’d be interesting to see if gravity has an effect on the sloped surfaces.  Will you automatically slide down, or do you need to press down to slide down?  Will the BB dinos move slower when walking uphill?  Since the dinosaurs in the screenshot above all are standing on flat surfaces, my guess is that there is automatic slide, and you can only escape from sloped trapped spaces by bubble-jumping yourself out.  Makes sense, since Famitsu is hyping about the difficulty of the new game.

Observation #3:

So there’s up to 4P multiplayer in Bubble Bobble Wii.  BUT, from the screen above, it seems like some of the attack item bubbles are color coded according to the player colors.  This might mean that the bubble attacks like lightning and fire are player-specific.  I have no idea whether or not this will hurt or enhance multiplayer.  I guess in theory, in a co-op game, players have to work together and delegate bubble duty; and in a versus game, someone can sabotage others by bursting and wasting their attack bubbles.

Observation #4:

Wow, these are some of the worst textures I’ve ever seen.  These look like they were made from an illegal copy Photoshop 3 Elements.

Mystery #5:

THESE LETTERS ON THE LEFT ARE KILLING ME!  I’ve always liked the E-X-T-E-N-D 1UP bubble collecting mini-game but what could the letters on the left be spelling?

H_RO_ _ _

_V_R

Help!

Pittie saves the family by taking the bullet…three times.

So I was watching Venture Brothers on TV the other night and there was this horrible Verizon commercial that aired.  The numbskull story set-up of the ad is as follows: hipster dude leaves his phone in the junkyard, hipster dude tries to retrieve his “unbelievably attractive” phone except…DUN DUN DUN…there are two chained violent-looking barking pit bulls near his phone.

OH THE SUSPENSE!  HE’LL NEVER GET HIS PHONE BACK!

Hipster dude then faces the dogs, reaches for the phone and YAY, the world is happy again.

Wow, lame.

So it isn’t bad enough that people are electrocuting pit bulls and forcing them to fight in their dingy basements.  Verizon felt the need to cash in on the pit bull-Vick controversy.  Lame and low.  I don’t know about you but I’m going to send them a little note about the whole thing:
Ivan Seidenberg, Chairman and CEO Verizon
140 West Street
New York, NY 10007

Good thing the iPhone is on sale!  I’m hoping Verizon users ditch their contracts and get themselves a nice shiny iPhone.  I want to see Verizon’s numbers plummet.

Otis at the Berkeley Pound back in December 2007.  We adopted him this March. You can see the scars underneath his chin.

Taken with the ActionSampler with Lomography Color 35mm 400 Film. Developed at Walgreens.

You can see the light leak in one of the frames!

The wedding is 2 weeks away. And one would think I’m freaking the fuck out right now.

Well, I’m not. I would’ve though. But something recently happened and it shifted my priorities.

A week ago, we found out that our favorite dog at the pound was scheduled for euthanasia. We wanted to adopt him last December but we weren’t sure if we could handle 2 dogs while drowning in wedding planning mire.

He’s a sweet dog, and we were sure that he’d find a home in no time!

Alas, most people who go to the pound are looking for excited little dogs. Otis is the exact opposite.

Otis is a quiet and mellow pit bull who likes sitting and staring. He was also abused before his days at the pound. I suspect he was punched in the mouth quite a lot since some parts of his teeth were *broken* off. He has a choke chain scar all around his neck. How can it be possible that a dog who suffered from such shitty human treatment can rise above all of this and be this sweet and this gentlemanly?

When I found out about Otis being on the euthanasia list at the pound, my heart puckered up and I sobbed for a while. PJ and I decided to take immediate action even though we know it’s going to take a lot out of us.

We have been rehabilitating Otis for a week now. He recently got out of surgery (neutering) and requires a very careful eye. I can’t say it has been a breeze for us but all those sleepless nights and long training sessions all seem worth it when we see that he’s getting happier and happier with his new owners, his new doggie brother, and his new home.

And I couldn’t believe how selfish I was back in December…that I was hesitant of saving a life just because my wedding was coming up. I was on the verge of becoming one of those bridezilla bitches who only cared about frivolous wedding details.

But things happen, and people change.

Our landlord’s assistant called us a few days ago, telling us that people are having problems with our dog.  Of course, he wasn’t very clear about it.  Today, we found out that the old Asian lady I mentioned before who poured chili pepper flakes in our doorway to hurt Cisco has been feeding exaggerated lies to our landlord.  Specifically saying:

-Cisco attacked her and bit her:  Um, okay, unless she broke into our apartment, how is it possible that our dog attacked someone totally without our knowing?  Cisco hangs out inside our apartment during the day and is under our supervision when we get off at work. It seems odd that if she got “attacked” by our dog, we never ever heard about it.

-She filed a report to Animal Care and Control:  Patrick called the ACC.  They told him that the only report they got from the residences on our street was a year ago.

Basically, it seems to me that she is trying her best to make our landlord nervous, and in turn to make him kick us out because of Cisco.

What the fuck?  Maybe I should start a letter writing campaign from all of the people (and dogs) who know Cisco and just spam my landlord and the old lady with letters.

I was walking Cisco in the dog area of our park near our apartment. A crazy Russian lady came up to me:

Lady: Can you leave the park with your dog? Because I hate dogs and my children hate dogs.

Me: Well, I hate children.  Can you leave the park with yours?

Bah, call me Michael Richards…this will be a pretty fire-fueled blog about bad Asian behavior. Just sayin’.

So a few weeks ago, PJ asked me if I spilled anything by our front door…which was a pretty odd thing to ask. I went over and to see what was spilled and lo and behold: someone poured red pepper chili flakes (of the pizza delivery variety) all over our doorway. While PJ had gears turning aimlessly in his head trying to figure out what, why, and when, I instantly knew what this meant and who did it.

You see, I was raised in Asia with Asian parents. This also means I’ve become particularly sensitive with the ancient Chinese secret of uber passive-agressive ettiquette tricks. My nose picks up every flavor and note of any Asian passive-aggressive sentiment hailing from the Old World.

Back in Taiwan, stray animals have been a constant problem. There was only one solution to stop rabies-laden horny cats from pissing and crapping all over your doormat day in and day out: sprinkle any capsaicin-laced powder on the doormat. My dad was particular fond of using leftover pizza chili flakes. Animals detest the smell, and not to mention the burning sensation they probably go through after sniffing that stuff. Now, I’m not saying this is the most humane thing but it’s on the same level with choke-chains, electrical fences, and hi-frequency pet alarms. There is a slight eyebrow-raising factor.

After I explained to PJ what the chili flakes meant, he got pissed. And in his non-passive-aggressive good ol’ American way, he put up a sign (written in PJ’s little boy handwriting) in the building:

“If I catch you putting anything through our doorway again, I WILL take you to court.”

We learned recently that the Susan and Dave, the neighbors we actually like, had a similar thing that happened to their apartment/dog and actually know who has been doing this. The old Asian lady who lives above us. She apparently has a vendetta against dogs…including Susan and Dave’s dog, Willy. Willy is a 14 years old…I don’t think Willy has the slightest energy to cause any trouble even if he wanted to.

I know your dirty Asian tricks, Old Asian Lady Neighbor Who Put Pepper Flakes In My Doorway. I know what you’re saying. You hate my well-behaved dog whose 80lb frame has been scaring off crack whores who break into our building to conduct their business in our backyard. You want to singe my dog’s nose off with chili flakes that you swept into our doorway? Ok, then this is war.